The Move

"Here's your check. I've got someone who needs to start Monday, doing what you're doing." "Ok, thanks for everything." But my heart felt heavy with shock . . . . My work had been dwindling for some time, and I was still looking for a new job. I wasn't sure what to do next. A few minutes later, my dad called and asked if I'd go to the food distributor and drive some food over for Dairy Queen (about an hour away). I said sure; I had nothing better to do. But little did I know God had something in the works. As I drove to the food distributor, I got a call from a lady in Clinton asking when I could come for a job interview. I asked if she could see me that afternoon, and she said she could. That was one week ago yesterday.

I've secured a place to live, landed the job, and packed up and moved my apartment since then. I've also had orientation at my new job - about a week's worth of training in 6 hours. I'll be living near Clinton, OK, where my immediate family lives. I'll be neighbors with my landlord, a family from my parents' church. I'll be (the only one) working in the medical records department at a nursing home here in town. So, here I go. Leaving the incredibly beautiful city of OKC that has been my home for almost 8 years and moving to small town, OK. I am nervous about leaving, but excited about the obvious Providence of God. Thanks to all of you who have inquired as to our change, and to those of you who have supported me. I'll have a new blog to tell of my small town adventures coming soon!

Be careful what you wish for . . .

I've been needing to make a decision for some time now. No, I haven't made it yet, so I'm not going to discuss it in detail. So, if you're just looking for my choice, don't bother reading further. :)

I've been praying about it and asking a few close friends to pray with me. It still seems as though I have no clear answer from God. Perhaps neither choice is right or wrong. Perhaps He is going to answer in a way I never expected, or in one of the ways I've already considered. Or, maybe, He is going to come through in a miraculous way at the "last minute." But one thing I know for sure, He is going to answer me. I have come to the point where I want to step out and follow Him, though I'm scared of what that means. It could mean continuing to wait, or it could mean making the choice that is not my preference. However, I do believe that God wants me to be willing to follow Him, step out in faith; yea, even take my "second choice" to find what He has for me.

Though fear and confusion reign, I know that God will lead me and will catch me when I step out in faith, even if I'm feeling like I'm falling. Praise God for His hands of mercy and grace that catch, hold, and guide us through our lives! And praise Him for friends He brings to remind us of His goodness and guidance!

One Word

A few days ago, a friend shared a verse of encouragement on my post regarding spiritual warfare. It was Exodus 15:27 "And they came to Elim, where were twelve wells of water, and threescore and ten palm trees: and they encamped there by the waters." The next day, on the KLOVE Morning Show, they were talking about their "One Word Challenge." They are encouraging everyone to choose a single word as their "motto" or "resolution" for 2011. Immediately, I thought of the verse my friend had posted, and the word "refresh(ment)" came to my mind.

The deserts of life - finances, children, joblessness, relationships, worry, loneliness, you name it - leave us parched, even nearly dead, and longing for refreshment. How many times I have been refreshed and wasn't even aware that I needed it! An encouraging text or note in the mail, a comment on facebook, a hug from a friend - these are all sources of refreshment. How many more times have I cried out to God from a place of sin or brokenheartedness, how often have I opened the Bible and begged Him to give me some drop of water to cool the burn of tiredness!

Refreshment gives us courage to face the unknown and strength to face the known; it prods us to take another step though our feet are bloody from the jagged rocks. It spurs us on to the mountaintop and shines hope on us in the valley. This year, I want to be refreshed by my seeking and God's answering. I want to refresh others the way I myself have been encouraged so many times.

Waiting

Pain, creeping up with each letter of each word, spoken and implied.

Brokenness, unfathomable in depth.

Praying for nothing worse, yet realizing somehow it is no better.

My soul cries for resolution, justice, relief . . . and receives none.

Wounds: open, raw, bleeding.

Longing to scab over, scar even.

Healing comes not, but desire lingers.

Desire unfulfilled leads to crossroads.

Faith tested and strengthened or abandoned?

Though nearly extinguished, hope faintly lingers.

Bloodied hands, wearied from fighting, pick up the pieces and wait on . . .